​Why We Lose Motivation (And How to Get It Back)

Jamal sat on his bed, staring at the ceiling. His phone was next to him, buzzing with notifications, but he couldn't bring himself to care. He had a pile of homework, a messy room, and a to-do list that felt never-ending. Yet, all he wanted to do was nothing. He felt stuck—like he was just going through the motions of life without actually living it.

Jamal's story isn't unique. Most of us grow up following orders. "Go to school." "Do your homework." "Clean your room." "Study for exams." It's always someone else telling us what needs to be done. After a while, we stop thinking for ourselves and just go with the flow. And guess what? That's exactly how we end up losing motivation. When we don't have control over our own choices, we stop caring.

Jamal felt this deeply. The more he let life happen to him instead of taking charge, the emptier he felt. And when your mind is empty, the devil sets in, tempting you to do stupid things. When you don't have a purpose, distractions take over, leading you down the wrong path.

One night, as he was scrolling aimlessly on his phone, he thought about his direction in life. It hit him—he was like a driver with a GPS but no destination. He was moving, but he had no idea where he was going. No wonder he felt lost. Having a clear goal gives you focus and a reason to keep moving forward.

Here's the good news: you don't have to stay stuck. Motivation isn't something you find—it's something you create. Here's how Jamal turned things around:

1. He took back control – Instead of waiting for instructions, he started making decisions for himself. Even small choices, like picking what to work on first, gave him a sense of ownership over his life.
2. He found his 'why' – Jamal asked himself why he was doing things. If it was just because someone told him to, he knew he wouldn't care. But when he connected his tasks to something meaningful, he felt more driven.
3. He broke free from routine – Doing the same thing every day was draining. So, he tried new things, challenged himself, and shook up his routine.
4. He started thinking for himself – Instead of waiting for others to tell him what to do, he began questioning things, exploring ideas, and figuring out what truly mattered to him.
5. He got curious – Curiosity fuels motivation. He started asking questions, exploring new interests, and learning things just for the fun of it. The more curious he became, the more exciting life felt.
6. He just started – Motivation comes from action, not the other way around. So instead of waiting to "feel" motivated, he just started small. And once he saw progress, his motivation naturally grew.

Jamal didn't figure all this out on his own. He had a coach—someone who had been where he was and helped him see things differently. That coach? That's me, the writer of this article. I've seen so many young people go through what Jamal did, and I know that with the right mindset and action, anyone can turn things around.

At the end of the day, motivation isn't about waiting for the perfect moment—it's about deciding to take control of your life. So stop waiting for someone to tell you what to do. Think for yourself, get curious, take action, and create the motivation you need. Like Jamal, you got this!